These tricks can also help you harness the power of your mind to hit goals that have felt totally impossible and out-of-reach. Read on!

Head to the end of this post to watch my Instagram Live to walk you through this process, step-by-step.

If you’ve been here a while, you know I hate flying.

Logically, of course, I know the plane won’t crash. But no matter how hard I try to remember that, the turbulence tricks my body into panic mode and it’s really hard for me to recover. At least, without alcohol.

For years, the availability of a stiff drink on the plane was just the cushion I needed to be able to coax myself onto the plane. But now that alcohol’s out of the picture for me, I no longer have that safeguard.

So, now what?

In the last few months, I’ve discovered some mindset tools that are working for me.

And they can help you get closer to facing your fears or hitting your goals too.

1. Think positive.

I hate to put something so cliche as my first point, but there’s no getting away from it.

If you wake up and say “today’s gonna suck,” I can guarantee you that today will suck!

But if you wake up and say “today is going to be a beautiful day, full of opportunity and purpose,” then you will find yourself living that out.

What we think is the life we build. What we think is our narrative of what happens around us. What we think is everything.

Right now, I’m in California where I flew to surprise my mom for her 65th birthday. A few days ago, when I got on the plane to come here, here are some of the thoughts I created:

I am so blessed that I’m able to get onto a plane today, and be a part of this monumental surprise for my mom.

I’m so grateful for siblings who I can plan a surprise like this with, and for my husband for supporting me at home so I can get away.

I am brave and I can do this.

I am in charge of my mindset today, and I feel powerful.

This coffee is delicious. It was so nice to have no kids so I could wait in that 20-minute Starbucks line for this luxury.

The next thing I knew, I was in my seat on the plane, ready to take off. I felt calm and satisfied. Since I’m not drinking right now, I took an Ativan before takeoff. It’s been described to me as a mini-Xanax. I am still fully present and engaged, but my body is more relaxed. My palms don’t sweat, my heart doesn’t race, and I feel totally alert and not tired.

2. Cheer yourself on!

It would been easy on my 5-hour flight across the country to get bogged down in “this is so long” mantra and feel like a total victim of the clock. Instead, I didn’t go there.

I read for a little bit, and then started a movie. At one point, I glanced at the screen of the passenger in the seat in front of me. Her display showed where the plane was and how long we had go to.

4 hours.

Immediately, I congratulated myself.

I’m already an hour in, and I haven’t even felt nervous yet! Go me!

I can’t believe how fast that hour went.

Only 4 hours left! I can do this! Look at me doing this!

When it comes to building a thriving life of purpose and joy, I’ve learned that celebrating every win along the way is a surefire way for me to keep going.

It also makes me feel really good! When I saw that display, I was truly proud of myself. Instead of letting that moment pass, I dwelled on it.

I cheered myself on.

Dwell on the victories! Congratulate yourself in your mind! When done over time, this creates new pathways in your brain that make it easier to make these choices next time.

In other words, when I see the clock again, or when I get on my next plane, or when there’s turbulence, I will be more prone to revisit this strategy: congratulating myself to keep my head in the game.

3. “I can do this.”

Sometimes, getting over a fear or just plowing forward toward goals is as simple as deciding that you will do it.

Not “I might.” Or “maybe someday.” Or “I’ll just try it but it I don’t like it, I’ll stop.” (Those can be great mindset tools for starting something though!)

But instead:

I have decided that I will do this, and that means I will do this.


No excuses. No outs.

In the case of the airplane, when we hit turbulence, here’s what I told myself:

You can do this, and you will. Look, you’re doing it! (See the choice and the congratulating myself in there?)

Thousands of planes are in the air every single day. You will be fine.

I am safe.

I can do hard things. I’ve navigated difficult relationships and birthed 4 kids. This is easy compared to what I’ve already done.

The thing I love about all these strategies is I feel powerful!

I don’t want to be a victim to my fear of flying, or a victim to a “I can’t do it” mentality that keeps me stuck in a cycle of feeling ineffective, lacking purpose and resentful.

I come from a position of power because I don’t have time for the lies that I “can’t do it.”

Your thoughts build your life.

Focus on positive, powerful thoughts, and before you know it, the thriving life you’ve always dreamed of will begin to take shape.


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A post shared by Janie Porter • Mom + Joy Coach (@shejustglows)

If you need more guidance with positive self-talk, I’d love to be that safe space for you through private coaching. Head to my Coaching page to learn more about how we can work together. You can also contact me directly at or through direct message on Facebook or Instagram.