One of the most eye-opening things about my one-on-one interview with mom-mogul and Real Housewives star Bethenny Frankel was that she’s just like me. Sure, I’m a stay-at-home mom who rarely showers, and she’s a millionaire mompreneur who leads the mega-successful SkinnyGirl empire in New York City, BUT we both need help from our mom friends! Bethenny was nice enough to share some of her tips for asking for help, and I compiled them here, along with some of my favorites.

1. Plan ahead. Don’t call your friend the day before that doctor’s appointment you forgot you can’t take kids to. Text her a week or 2 before, and ask if she can watch your kid. It’s better for everyone if you plan ahead. And, chances are, she’ll be able to do it!

2. Get organized! “I feel like moms are often scrambling, and I’m very organized,” Bethenny told me. When I interviewed her, it was Halloween day, and she was in Tampa for the opening of a new outlet mall. “So, I’m here for a couple hours, [and my daughter’s at a friend’s house for a party]. I’ve been planning this for 6 months.” Plan ahead. Get out that calendar and use it!

3. Offer to help. You’re not the only one who needs help! Offer randomly to help your friends, and then it’ll be easier to ask for help when you need it too. (My best friend and I trade kids every week, as part of our babysitting co-op, and it’s amazing.)

4. Remember that no one expects you to do it all. “I think that women try to do it all, and then, at the last minute, they realize they can’t,” she told me. “You have to think about motherhood and activities as a chess game.” Learn how to ask for help, and learn when to offer it. Not because you’re keeping score. But, because it’s just as good to give as to receive!

5. Don’t feel bad about it. Everyone needs help, especially those of us who have no family nearby. Asking for help doesn’t make you a failure, and it shouldn’t be something you’re embarrassed about. Own it!

How do you ask friends for help? Share in the comments section below! And, a huge thank you to Bethenny for taking a few minutes to share these awesome tidbits with me! I loved getting to meet you.

Bethenny Frankel: 5 Ways to Ask Mom Friends for Help