My loathing of the laundry pile is well-documented in these parts. And I know many of you are with me. Now, it’s time for us to tell the rest of the world why.
1. There’s too much of it. Whether you have one kid or 9, the fact is the same: you will never be caught up on laundry. And my dad told me a long time ago to start with the battles I can win. This is not one of them. So I don’t even start. (I actually do have a rule of doing one load per day, but that’s not as funny so I left it out. *wink*)
2. I can’t see the progress. When I put the clothes in the washing machine, there are all sorts of fun things to do, like spray stains and add soap. The sound of the water gushing into the machine is exciting and makes me feel like I’m really accomplishing something. When I drop that load of clothes into the tub, I feel like I’m dropping my cares into a basin of soapy goodness. But with folding, there is none of that. It’s just me and the pile. And that just doesn’t excite me.
3. I have a toddler. This means that these clothes will be dumped onto the floor a minimum of 4 times before they’re actually put away. Which, in reality, means they’re getting dirty again. Fail.
4. I have a baby. This means that I have to hold another person while trying to fold said laundry. Have you ever held a baby while trying to fold your husband’s sweats? It just doesn’t work. A washcloth is all the one-handed folding I got in me. And then, I’m spent.
5. We’re going swimming tomorrow. This means all the towels in this clean pile of laundry will be getting unfolded and used again tomorrow. So why should I bother?
6. The kids know where their clothes are. When all your clean laundry sits on the dining room table, your kids know exactly where to go when they need clean underwear, swim trunks or pajamas. Why confuse them and ask them to look in all these different confusing drawers and cubby holes when you can just send them to the dining room table? And that’s what I like to call a #momhack.
7. That’s what mother-in-laws are for. My mother-in-law folds laundry whenever she visits from California, and I love her for it. If yours lives closer to you, all the more reason. Give that woman something to do. It’s your duty.
8. It’s just going to get dirty again anyway. I know for a fact that, as soon as the kids get up from their naps, they’ll want to put on the play clothes right at the top of the pile. So again, this is a time-saver. You’re welcome.
9. All the drawers are already full. This is because I haven’t had time to switch out the kid clothes that my kids have outgrown. (And besides, what’s wrong with squeezing the 2-year-old into those old 12 month jean shorts?) And thus, there is not space for the new clothes that do fit. This makes the clean laundry pile a perfect place for them to live.
10. Who wants to eat dinner at the table anyway? We’re not above moving the pile to the side, and squeezing into half of the table to eat. But, let’s just be honest: the couch is more comfortable anyway.
11. It’s already wrinkled anyway. After 5 and a half days of sitting on the laundry couch/table/bed, it’s already not feeling that fresh. Why would I want to add a step to the unending task of laundry putting-away, and throw these clothes back in the dryer to dewrinkle? That’s a bad idea. Plus, it would waste energy.
12. Then I have to put it away. Which is arguably the worst part of the whole laundry process. It’s incredibly arduous to walk laundry separately to everyone’s room. Especially if I’m holding the baby, which means I can only take what I can hold in one hand, without the assistance of an arm-to-body hold. It’s just not efficient. So thus, I won’t do it.
13. I just want to watch my show. Let’s be honest: if it’s between folding laundry and raiding the DVR during my kid-free time, I’m going to TV. Every. Single. Time.
14. The laundry pile isn’t really “dirty.” By virtue of it being clean laundry, it’s really not affecting the cleanliness of the house. And thus falls below the priority of the dirty kitchen sink, dirty bathrooms and dirty floors.
15. It feels really great to sleep under clean laundry. If you haven’t had the pleasure of sleeping underneath 3 to 4 loads of clean laundry that have sat atop your comforter all week, you are really missing out. By Friday, the falling-to-sleep process is really quite grand.
Make us laugh and share your laundry bed/couch/table pictures in the comments of this post on the Facebook page!
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